MOVING!
Go there then!
If you're even interested.
http://teratine.livejournal.com
I'm changiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing:D
SEEYOU!
1:08 AM
|


I KNOW WHO I CAN POSSIBLY PSYCHO TO THE ZOO!
IGGY! You're a darling aren't you?
& I know you read this dumb blog.
PREEEEEEEEETY PLEASE GO WITH ME?
I'll bake/cook you ANYTHING you want to eat!
SAY YES PLEASE?
For me? HEH.

Results are depressing & upsetting.
But, it's time to move on from them.

AND IGGY HAS AGREED!
YAY YAY.
I knew I could count on you!
Thanks hon.

I dread school tmr.
One week & 4 more days to my holidays.
I so cannot wait.

I'm happy.(:
I've finally come to a decision.
9:40 PM
|


I can't sleep again.
It's annoying me.
1:01 AM
|


Well, FengHang's leaving tmr.
BYE, we'll miss you muchly.
Take care & I hope you get tons of breaks.

Zoo was a no go 'cause of the rain.
& the lack of company):
I was so looking forward to it lah.
BLAH):

Funny how the eXcess people dislike FireFight.
Ah wells, doesn't matter.
They never fail to make me happy.
That's all that matters.

Ther was saying that she & Guna I think came up with a theory.
On why I dislike going to CTK so much.
I think they said something about the church pushing me away so I end up being more inclined to COOS & SonicEdge.
I can't really remember actually.
& I don't think it'll be wise of me to comment much on this topic considering it's so sensitive.

SEE! I'm learning to grow up already!
Heh.

& no I didn't attend mass.
Felt too lazy.
But the publicity posters are up!
I so have to see them, heh.

I have a craving for osmanthus green tea suddenly, don't ask me why.
Perhaps after being on a virtual diet of coke for the past few days,
I kinda want something different.

I hate sundays.
It's back to school tmr.
2 more weeks of hell & it's the good ol' holidays.
Next week's filled with NP stuff.
I'm trying not to cringe.
But then again, I should try being more active since we're leaving soon.

I wanna go around S'pore eating all the good stuff.
But I need someone who knows where these places are.
Mama's too sick to bring me around):

I like what I'm hearing.
iamdavidsparkle!

It's good to catch up with old friends, hello Nigel!
& Melster & Tim are at my house now.
8:10 PM
|


I can't seem to sleep.
I've been up since 1 plus.
& I've been online since 2.30.
I feel like such a computer geek.
But no, I haven't done anything apart from listening to music, changing the skin, & stoning at the screen of my com.

I think I'll head outside to the living room to watch a movie.
Then maybe I'll start on breakfast.
If I'm lucky, by then it'll be time to go for mass.
Oh joy, mass.
I reserve my comments about it.
I guess, I'm biased perhaps.
But, I just prefer service a lot more.

I just thought of something random.
Maybe if I just stopped being so afraid of being alone with SE,
who knows, they may just open up even more.
I mean, if a supposedly shy person like Liana talks to me, it does mean they're beginning to accept me... right?
I sure hope so though.

JUNE 3RD:D
3 more weeks to go, it seems an eternity.

Gordon's coming for comfirmation.
-GRINS.
Haha, I can just imagine.
What would be sweet was if Iain & ahLeong came as well.
Josh is always busy & I hardly know JBarks.
But, who am I trying to kid?
They hardly know me as well, apart from settlers with ahLeong.
5:55 AM
|


I'm glad I went.
I don't deny that it was weird & kinda lonely.
But my own fault for choosing not to mingle.
My social skills have recently deteriorated like crazy.

Still, Turtle aka IainTham never fails to amuse me.
I'm sorry I nicknamed you Turtle, it just seems apt.
Thankyou.(:

I think if JonChan hadn't asked me to sit with him,
I'd have gone to the back & sat there by myself.
That's how anti-social I was.
He was super funny lah.
'Huh, you're crying? Don't cry lah. Everything will be all right!'
Thankyou Jon, you kept me sane during service.

The after service part was awkward initially.
Where I stood there not knowing what to do.
Then took my bag & tried to leave, only to have JonChan asking me to stay for dinner.
& then JonChia came over & Liana.
Love muchly.

Dinner with Gordon(yay he's back), Milton, Aaron & JonChia cheered me up.
Meridian's food is an absolute joy while the others went to Little India.
Jon amuses me to no end, & yeah, I can't stay sad when he's there.
& it's just good to be around them.

Relationship with the 'rents never used to be this bad.
I wonder how it actually got to this point.
But then again, when you throw 3 stubborn & proud people together.
It's really what you'll get then.
):

I miss hearing FF live.
Hell, I miss settlers.
& I miss my cell.
I need the things that make me happy.
I need the people who make me smile.

Hello, where are you?
2:32 AM
|


Service starts in about 2 & a half hours.
I'm scared. =/
Though of what I'm not very sure.
Jem claims that SE doesn't feel weird around me.
But I'm still nervous.
I'm gonna go early early, so I can somehow talk to some of them first.

AH):
Ok, I should be heading to take a shower now.
Oh man, I want my ice cream & zoo.
HAHA.
3:33 PM
|


I think I need to head back to CTK this sunday.
I haven't been there for a month already,
& I'm kinda missing the people.

Results were disappointing to say the least.
):

JonChan never told me anything):
So I was stuck at home listening to the 'rents being a bitch.
):

I wanna go for service tmr!
But I'll have to go alone):
-GULPS.

I still want my ice cream & I wanna go to the zoo.
Now I just have to find a companion.
I may choose to walk around & visit random places alone.
But I'll be damned if I'm gonna head to the bloody zoo by myself.
I'm not such a loser... yet. Right?

):
1:54 AM
|


I realise I've been posting a lot today.
BUT BUT, JonChan hasn't gotten back to me about the gig,

AND! I CAN'T SEEM TO TUNE MY BASS.
& THE STUPID PLUG FOR THE AMP WON'T GO INTO THE SOCKET.
Talk about being upset.
AH!))))):

TURTLE! I need green turtles & ice cream now now now!
9:09 PM
|


I think Jem's still very mad at me.
I'm so so so sorry.):
He hasn't replied my msgs.
SHIT?
I really didn't mean to fall asleep):

On a sidenote, today was hell fun.
We had ice cream, then subway & esplanade.
Y'know what, I absolutely love you.

7:39 PM
|


You break my heart):
Gosh I'm hungry, & I want fooooooooood.
Iggy is a dumb pot.=/
12:38 PM
|


I think I'm currently very screwed.):
I was supposed to watch the manutd match & I fell asleep.
The worst thing is Jem was waiting for 20 mins for me.
I have this feeling he's pissed at me, shit.
I honestly didn't mean to sleep.
Oh man.

Now I'm scared again, blah.
10:17 AM
|


To be absolutely honest, I was kinda dreading cell today.
'cause Jeremy wouldn't be there, & it'll be like the first time without him.
I'm very very glad I went though.:D

I hope that your life is as wonderful as how God planned it for you.
I think that's what Pastor Dan said on saturday.
I had forgotten about it actually, Kevin reminded us just now.
Thankyou!

YAY, they liked the chocolate thingy:D
Their comments make me smile.
& I swear the guys are damn sweet lah.
Plainsunset has a gig on friday at Home & obviously I'm underaged.
But Jon Chan said he'll ask around if I can go in!
Awesome, now I just have to get him to call me TINE instead of Celest.
YAY, love!

AND AND because I drank too much water, I needed to pee badly.
& well the church is locked by the time cell ends,
the coffeeshop toilet is too far & disgustingly dirty, & macs is also too far.
I almost went to the guys toilet nearby 'cause I was beyond desperate to pee.
Iain & ahLeong were damn nice lah, they were gonna chase away all the ah peks for me first, then stand guard at the door.
Luckily, Iain brought me to the wakemeup store instead.
It's a clean toilet with toilet paper making me a very happy girl.
Oh, & the wakemeup store is super cosy man.

Went home with JonChia after.
I'm glad I'm being accepted into my cell now.
Even Iain's talking to me, haha.
& FengHan's leaving next monday.
Oh man, I hope he get frequent leaves then he can come back.
HEH.

I've got my application form for bsp(:
& the Anberlin tickets!
& I'm seeing Iggy tmr.
Yep, bad mood has flown away.

& bsp is expensive sia.
For a nonmember of the church that is.
I kinda gotta pay 70 bucks a year.
But it's pretty worth it lah.
12:56 AM
|


My shopping partner's abandoning me at 4.30.
So pardon me if I'm grouchy today.
No, I'm not in a particularly good mood at all.
Oh sheesh.
No one is free to chill with me till 7 plus.
Yep, I'm in a very foul mood currently.

I hate plans screwing up last minute.
Please don't tell me it's my fault again.
'cause that's what you always do.
& frankly, I'm close to breaking.

Screw off, thankyou.
11:06 AM
|


MY VOICE STILL SOUNDS LIKE CRAP):
When I sing that is, otherwise I still believe it's sexy.
HAH. Ok Tine should shut up.

I'm meeting IGGY on Thursday:D
YAY!

I'm excited. Midyrs are finally over!
But the checking of paper is this friday):
I dread, but that's ok, I have faith.

I'm finally heading back to cells.
-Grins.

& I'm craving food.
& I wanna watch the manutd chelsea match tmr!
& I'm speaking rather disjointedly.
Ah wells.
11:32 PM
|


Here's the part where I look at you & say how happy I am.
Here's also the part where I say my moods have been fluctuating.
& the part when I tell you that I feel like crying.
& that it scares me how much faster I'm drifting away from them.

It's scary when the people I've thought strong, cry.
I've seen the most cheerful people break down in tears.
Guys whom I love & respect so much break down & cry.
& for some reason, that scares me.

I need a security stronghold & not just listening to music everyday.
The things in my head are currently very jumbled up.
Last paper's tmr!
But I haven't studied much, I'm gonna fail.
FireFight. Iain, Jon.
Kevin Chow, Josh.
Cindy, Gordon, Iggy.
Jesus, Ben & Jerry's ice cream.
I said it was jumbled up.

Tell me why I should feel safe & protected.
Tell me why I'm falling.
I don't like.):
1:42 AM
|


I'm exhausted.
I can't wait for the massage later, at least if there is. I hope.
I badly need to recharge before my last paper tmr.
I can't wait for this period to be over.
Though I gotta start cramming for prelims soon as well.

I was talking to STICK last night!
I'm glad we're both much happier this year.
I love you very much muchly.
YAY, birthday treat!(:
LOVE like billions.

I like Twister.
HEH.

AND I WANT TO SLEEP.
But NO, I have to study.
Oh chicken chilli fishcakes.
8:57 AM
|


They make me feel weird still, but I'm trying.
I don't want this to end just like that.
The guys are a bunch of asses, I'll give you that.
Yet, I don't know.
Oh man):

MEDIA RES
The art of suddenly beginning somewhere, yet no where.
Oh yeah, it's something you've always used with pride.
Exclaiming with pure glee when they fall for it.
Gullible souls were they not? The people you chose to kill.

TORMENTS & NIGHTMARES
A figment of my imagination perhaps.
Yet, it's not what the doctor ordered, was it?
Senseless claims & redundant promises.
Indeed the door broke open the day you faded.

HYPOCRISY LACED WITH FANTASY
You're my epitome of joy.
Frighteningly enough, you've never cared much for niceties.
Strike when the iron's hot, you taught the concept well.
Pity you could never attend the grad party.

FRADULENT DREAMS
Plaguing the nights with their montrosity.
Hiding deep in the black corner, were you not?
Glassy blackness that could never make the cut.
You were always a sucker for pleasantries.

SCREAMING BALLS OF FIRES
Guarded desires with gates made of steel.
Deities & missionaries never ceased to amaze you.
Created from small, foolish, boy-child fantasies.
Love comes & go, the way you've always done.
Suddenly, goodbye seems infinitely harder.

BUT NEVER IMPOSSIBLE.
11:50 PM
|


& they're a 5 piece.
sweeeeeeeeet, & with chris.
Oh man, my favourite few:D
Absolute love.
Ok, I shall stop acting like a delirious groupie.
Tine will NOT let stupid ah Leong be right.

Seriously, shut up about the groupie thing lah):
Biggest fan, fine whatever.
Groupie? Uh uh no freaking way.

I lost that whole studying mode I was in already.
Service was interesting:D

Jon Chan amused the crap outta me trying to get the bus driver to wait for us.
Josh is still the same naggy/okfineconcerned guy.
Things haven't changed much.

Studied with Hazel at Sengkang after that.
Random conversations along the way.
We talked about faith mostly.
I always love conversations on faith.
It amused us when we realised Jem isn't gonna be the only one who can answer our questions regarding our faith.
Hopefully everything goes well, & by then we will get our diploma too!
Then we can have a conversation that isn't one-sided. YAY(:

Point to note. Why are the FireFight boys being so friendly suddenly?
They never used to be this nice, well according to Hazel.
& honestly, my first impression was that they were stuck ups.
But ah wells, who really cares? It doesn't matter much.
They're awfully nice friends when they don't tease.

We want settlers!
I'm an addict suffering from withdrawal.
I crave a good game with the same ol' few,
followed by supper & gossip.
See, I'm 'legal' now. I can stay out past 11.
HEH.

& it's Jo's birthday today.
Happy Birthday darling!
I wanna be 21 too!
& that's another 5 years which is so depressing.
By the time Jem & Gordon get back, I still WON'T be an adult.
Oh man, I'm damn young compared to them lah.

It's four am! Gosh.
I wanna sleep soon.
I think I stayed up just to listen to music.
HAHA.

5 piece!
I so cannot wait:D

Labels: 1

3:35 AM
|


I'm tired, but I'm in that mood whereby I'm gonna force myself awake.
Dinner was a sham, in short bloody pathetic.
The tension and the awkwardness...
Gosh, & it was supposed to be something happy.
Well fun & happy my freaking ass.

I had my cake after all.
Awww, they were so sweet.
Ben, Jo, Nat & Guna appeared at my house suddenly at about 10 yesterday.
Oh man, they were awesome(:

Oh & Jem's a bloody idiot for spreading shit.
AND ah Leong's a bigger ass for spreading more shit.
I wish I can confidently say I hate the both of you.
Unfortunately, that's unlikely to ever happen.
BLAH, you guys suck.
1:09 AM
|


To be absolutely honest, I feel like something lacking.
I'm taking a rather long break from studying.
I kinda have had enough of it.

I should be cramming,
just like I should be panicking.
Funny thing, I'm doing neither.
I just want the weekend here.
3 more subs to go before it's all over.
3 of the hardest subs ever, & pretty heavy ones at that.
Emaths, bio & lit.
Lit terrifies me, simply 'cause I'm far from prepared.

It's quite a dull way to spend your birthday come to think of it.
Lunch with Ther & Jo.
Then ice cream at haagen daaz, however the sotong you spell it.
I never got my cake, but then again, I shouldn't bother.

Hello, you old friend.
I miss you bad.

Staring at old pictures of Godknowswhen,
I can't believe I used to look so young... & innocent.
I wonder where that naivety & innocence went.

I missed both cells this week.
It kinda makes me feel lacking, somewhat.
I really wanna head down for service.
I need some kind of spiritual something.
I can't find the exact words to describe just what.

FireFight, Whence He Came...
I'm kinda using music to retain my sanity now.
I need a long break.
I can't wait for this year to be over.
But then again, it's only May.
There's a long long way to go.

How long more till breaking point?
9:21 PM
|


It's kinda weird waking up with the revelation that,
I'm gonna fail chem & geog,
I'm still sick,
oh and I'm sixteen. Finally.
Haha.

Uma is the sweetest person ever.
She actually called me at midnight to wish me.
& considering her family, that was kinda dangerous lah.
Oh my, thankyou babe!

Well, I kinda got Jem to wake me at 3 so I could cram.
But then again, I am rather lazy.
I don't know.):

Oh, we didn't go for cell yesterday.
Hazel & Jem wanted to study,
& I just won't go alone, so yeah.
Besides, I really wasn't feeling well yesterday.
Ah wells.

I can't believe I actually slept at 10.
Hence the no studying for chem & geog.
What can I say, I think my health is more important than grades.

I'm listening to FireFight now.
Kinda like the first thing I'm doing after waking up, HEH.
I love though.

Thankyou for remembering.
I wasn't sure you would.
LOVE.(:
4:34 AM
|


i highly dislike coming down with flu, cough & a sore throat in one go.
& when lack of food joins in,
tine becomes a highly irritable bitch.
like just about now.
it is annoying the crap out of me.

ss was terrible.
i didn't manage my time bloody properly.
& ended up throwing away 13 marks.
when you minus 13 from 50,
& think of all the crap you've written.
what's left behind is pretty very little.
oh goodness, what was i thinking?
i can't follow lkc's bloody strategy.
i'll stick to mine from now on.

amaths was relatively do-able lah.. i hope.
at least, i don't know, maybe i didn't make careless mistakes again.
i hate exams, period.

cell tonight:D

i still feel detached.
i don't like.

tmr!
i'm excited, haha.
fishnchips at tp. yay(:
i still want a cake, but ah wells.
it doesn't matter much anymore.

oh bloody hell,
it just keeps getting worse.):
1:30 PM
|


ah leong is an ass who keeps spreading baseless rumours.
ok, not entirely baseless, but still.
stupid idiot, i feel like poking him till he dies.
ah wells, ass.

i think i may be falling sick. shit?
maybe i can skip next monday:D

today was nice, yay.
& yes, i had fun.
spidey with jem, hazel, fenghan, ahleong, josh, chris, jacq, tom, alena, dex, jon.
awesome, the show is goooooooooood.
alena and i were the most drama mamas.
screaming & crying & omgs. heh.

chilled at macs at tanglin mall for some time.
i swear jonchia keeps getting more random & random.
but still, he always makes me laugh.

i wonder if gordon's back?
hmmm.

amaths & ss tmr.
i detest!
especially since nothing is going into my head):
i'm terrified i'll fail.
i think i'll wake up earlier to cram.

oh, & it's never good to have fun before studying.
i wasn't in the mood to.
ah wells.

jem & hazel are awfully sweet!
they bought me havainas, like shit.
ohmygoodness, damn sweet lah.
love!

i hate how ahleong keeps referring to me as the biggest fan.
ok not hate, but it gets irritating.
especially hearing how they like to talk about me.-.-
yeah, i happen to love them.
but still, idiots.

fenghan's leaving in two weeks.):
ah leong might be leaving.
gordon's gonna leave.
jem's gonna leave.
blah):

random ravings, yes
i still hope i can fall sick.
i think this year's npdp in school is utterly redundant.
shhh, don't say i said it.

firefight's got new & better demos.
sweeeeeeeeeet.
yay, haha.

i wanna go shopping soon.
i need to rid myself of exam blues.
that's what i hate most about exam periods.
i always seem to get stressed & it sucks.
'cause stressed equals periods when i wanna cry/get all upset.

my stomach hurts btw,
i think i'm hungry.):
12:08 AM
|


abject loneliness.
yeah, shut up tine.

i overslept for tuition.
now it's way too late to go.
i'm damn screwed.
& my paper's tmr.
chillichickenfishcake.):

tine is dead.

i hate how you can feel lonely even in a big group.
i hate how i miss you more than words can describe.
i hate how we've drifted so far along.

but then again, it's my own fault.

i think i'm making a very big mistake right now.
but no matter, i can't possibly correct it now.
not without hurting people's feelings.
& really, i'm trying not to.

there seems to be this little voice in my head,
& it's repeating stuff that you might say.
everytime i wanna make a decision or whatever,
i seem to hear your comments in my head.
will i be crazy if i say that much as i hate it,
i don't want the voice to go away?
'cause it's the only way i can hear you.

god, tine should just stop acting like she broke up with someone.

hurt is cold, and it freezes to the bone.

ah wells,
10:20 AM
|