pretty please let me fall sick.
im this teeny bit close.

and i've determined my reasons for loving gift of love.
im definitely gonna go back on my own.
i love the people there.
and most of all,
its the one place where i actually feel happy.
and very contented.
especially when feeding them.
'cause they make me feel like i actually belong.
and yes i do know the exact word that i wanna use to describe how i feel.
only im not in the mood to.

and when i leave, i have this urge to smile.
and im happy, grace ate a litle more today.
it doesnt matter how long i have to stand there,
hunched over, slowly feeding her the porridge.
its worth it.
maybe she hates me feeding her,
or she just doesnt care,
but to me, it actually means a lot.

i counted 6 pretty visible ones.
and about 5 others as well.
i cant decide if im proud of them,
or disgusted.
i guess i'll never be able to.
9:40 PM
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