that's something to ponder over i guess.
when the hell will i actually have the guts to stand up and say stop.
something tells me i'll always be a coward though.
one of those idiots who'll always complain too fucking much,
yet will never have the guts to go about doing something to settle the problem.
yep, that'll be me.

it's so typical though huh.
i always thought one day i'd mature to be a girl with guts.
i thought wrong apparently, oh so dead wrong.
even the way i am now, i disgust myself.
it's seriously appalling to look at myself in the mirror.
and see the person i am now.
maybe she was right all along.

funny, i thought i told myself i wouldn't be bothered by her.
what the fuck am i thinking now then?
i guess somehow those words will always stay.
i can tear up everything else, throw everything away.
but the memories still remain.
those goddamned fucking words of hers still remain.
hell, they're stuck in my head.

it's times like these that i want to be hugged so badly.
and i want someone to tell me that really it's all in my fucking head.
but then again, my baby can't come to live.
eeyore will forever be eeyore, nothing but a toy.
and i will always be this fucked up.
10:00 PM
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