you don't know shit.

fuck this, i'm mad at you guys for that.
yet, i'm madder at myself for getting mad at you'll.
tell me why?

by saying all that to me,
you guys are just spurring me on to doing stupider stuff.
hell, i've almost convinced myself to go down on wednesday.

haven't you realised by now who's the biggest influence?

i wish you'd understand,
when it crashes down on you,
& you see the door slamming shut,
how it feels to be left out on the asphalt.

i wish you'd see,
when all's been said and done,
& there's no path left up the hill,
how it feels to be brought to your knees in the cold.

the void consumes everything,
& try as i may, there's no rope going out from the abyss.
it's bringing everything to a halt,
& the heavens won't cry even when the end comes screeching to a close.
you're encroaching in on my comfort zone,
& it's too cold and lonely now.

i wish you'd find,
when the light loses it's colour,
& the darkness cloaks the deceit and lies,
what's left of the brokenness.

i wish you'd know,
when the cold numbs all the senses,
& the chasm eats away at the fringes of your sanity,
where all the crippled shards have dissipated to.

the void consumes everything,
& try as i may, there's no rope going out from the abyss.
it's bringing everything to a halt,
& the heavens won't cry even when the end comes screeching to a close.
you're encroaching in on my comfort zone,
& it's too cold and lonely now.

forget all this mess,
& just go to sleep once again.
remain in the safety of your home,
where all the uninitiated stay,
& i'll go to a place where you won't find me.
it's there where the light finally meets the dark,
& it's the start of something new.
7:33 PM
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